Happy Holiday Tips #2

As you likely know by now, my mission is to help us all learn how to listen, speak and act from the wisdom of our own hearts.  Since life constantly reminds me that speaking my truth is often easier said than done, I’ve accepted that this approach is a lifelong PRACTICE.   I don’t know about you, but I’ve found that speaking my truth is often hardest when I am surrounded by family (go figure). And since this is the season for family, I am getting lots of practice.  Most recently I’ve been struggling with how to speak my truth when it’s socially awkward or risky to do so. Don’t get me wrong here. If someone harasses or assaults me, my days of remaining silent are long gone. What I’m talking about here are the lesser “evils” that we all have dealt with at some point.   I suspect many of you can relate. Someone at a family gathering says or does something rude or hurtful. What do we do? Speak up? Remain silent?   Speaking up for ourselves may go against the grain of family expectations. No one wants a kerfuffle. Especially during the holidays.  So the response is often one of tolerance for the sake of peace.  “You know they didn’t mean anything by it. Why don’t you just chill.” When we choose to speak up, though, we are choosing to set a personal boundary. Saying out loud: “Your behavior is not ok with me.” Does that make you quiver in your boots?   Even writing about it is hard for me. Silence was the rule in...

My Little Blue Pill – Guide to Holiday Happiness!

Last night I lost my sleeping pill. Somewhere between the family room and the kitchen, it fell off my tray and disappeared. A tiny little pill. With powerful results. Two very curious kittens. Potentially lethal results. Unlike prior times, I didn’t start beating myself up for not noticing when that little thing went missing. I didn’t curse myself for changing my routine and placing my pills on the tray instead of in my hand. Instead, I got to work to find it. I slowly walked my path a few times, doing my best to “soften” my eyes and really look at where I was walking. This often does the trick when things disappear. Not this time. So I got closer to the ground and did that sweep again. Nada. I was reluctant to bring out the vacuum cleaner – those little pills are valuable. 🙂 I knew it was there. I just couldn’t see it. “Aha!” I thought. “This is why the NCIS agents use those bright flashlights when they’re looking for evidence.” So I got my NCIS-type flashlight, turned out the lights and started to slowly scan the floor. And there it was. My little blue pill on the blue stripe of the rug on the kitchen floor. SCORE! Kitty disaster averted. Pill not wasted. And… what a great metaphor. Turning out the lights allowed me to focus at the end of the light-beam and not get distracted by the rest. This was the gift of my lost pill. I found it when I chose only to focus on what matters. What a great piece of everyday wisdom. Focus on what matters....

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